Why are you avoiding failing, and why does it look like it is the end of the world when you fail at something dear? To define failure in any context, you must first ask: what are you falling short of? What standards are you lacking? By which metrics are you failing? You can’t truly know what it means to fail if you don’t know what it means to succeed.
I have failed so many times in my life. I still fail sometimes, but I am not a failure. I know that school sabotage our relationship with failure. It installs in us some negative ways to deal with and handle failure. The results of your test and exams, states if you passed or failed. If you fail, there are consequences—your teachers and parents might be disappointed with you, you probably won’t get into the next class or the next level of your program. You might repeat or be kicked off. The price of failing is a very high price. You just can’t afford to fail.
Having this in mind, we have a terrible relationship with failure. Our educational system literally teaches us to associate failing with people being angry with us, opportunity slipping away, and having to spend our entire summers at school while our friends are all having fun outside. The message we learn from this is not positive. It instils the fear of failing in us. The moment you have the fear of failing, you will attract more failing. It is a never ending vicious cycle. If you fail, you’ll be punished. Supposedly, if you manage to not fail, you’re OK until you fail. The problem is that this belief is horribly misguided, and it sets us up for a lifetime of failure outside of the classroom.
To get better you need to change your own definition of failure. This will enable you to change your perspective. This will enable you to see the positive in failing and attract positive results despite failing. You have no option, but to accept failing is good for you. Failure is a necessary precursor to ultimate success. Want to make it big in the real world? Fail early, fail fast, fail often, as the saying goes.
When you fail, it is the process that failed, and not you. Creating a purposeful life requires messing up and venturing into the unknown. While we all want success, this is not guaranteed. That’s why the ability to recover from setback and move forward is essential. And this starts with embracing, processing, and even benefiting from failure. Failure is the best teacher. Until you experience failure, you won’t learn the secrets embedded that will enable you to succeed. Scientists have long understood that the brain has two ways of learning. One is avoidance learning, which is a punishing, negative experience that trains the brain to avoid repeating mistakes. The other is reward-based learning, a positive, reinforcing experience in which the brain feels rewarded for reaching the right answer.
In the educational system, failure means lost opportunity. But in the real world, failure is the currency for success. There is no success without failure. No matter how brilliant you think you are, you can’t tiptoe past failure on the way to success, failure is the front door. You’re not better or smarter than failure, you’re not above it and you can’t escape it. You’re going to fail many times, probably more than you succeed. If that idea made you queasy, well, get used to it. Failure doesn’t mean you are not good enough. Failure is just a data for you to work with. It is basic information that gives insight. It is a feedback.
The currency you earn from failing is the data and information the failure presents to you. How you use this data and information will determine how successful you will become. The more times you fail, the more data you earn, and the richer and more knowledgeable you become. Failure should not be taken for granted. It should not be taken on a face value. It is valuable to fail. As a matter of fact, failure is as precious as gold. If you want to achieve anything worthwhile, you must let go of the idea that failure is something to avoid. Nobody wants to fail, but you must be willing to fail if you ever want the chance to succeed.
Life is not like a restaurant where you can choose your meal. You don’t have the choice and leisure to choose between failure and success. It doesn’t matter how much you achieve, or how good you think you are, you’ll never be immune to failure. Expect it often. Anticipate it. Remember that even though you can have failure without success, you can’t have success without failure. Failure is inevitable.
There is always room for improvement no matter how great you are. Sometimes, you’ll never know which areas need improvement unless you fail. You learn more from failure than from success. Failure makes you stronger, not weaker. Failure shouldn’t break or stop you, because you’re unstoppable. If you break or stop, it is not because of failing, it is because you decided to give up. You made the decision to give up. You take more chances in life when you are not afraid to fail. When you fail, oftentimes you’ll realise the present path you’re on is not the right one. You invest more time, and you discover a better path that leads to your goals and objectives. Failing shows you the right path.
Whenever you fail you have a choice. It is either you focus on the facts or you focus on the emotions. If you emphasise your feelings after an instance of failure, you’ll succumb to the victim mindset. Don’t make yourself a victim. If you are a victim of failure, your focus becomes your misfortune. Victims are passive and helpless. Failure feels worse than it is if you feel like a victim.
When you fail, don’t make it personal. Just because you haven’t found a successful way of doing something doesn’t mean you are a failure. Look at the failure analytically. Don’t be in a hurry to shove it. There are lessons to be learned. Dissect it, learn all you can. Why did you fail? What might have produced a better outcome? Was the failure completely beyond your control? After gathering the facts, step back and ask yourself, what did I learn from this? Think about how you will apply this newly found insight going forward.
Obsessing over your failure will not change the outcome, so stop dwelling on it. Often our fear of failure is rooted in our fear of being judged and losing others’ respect and esteem. You don't need anyone’s approval. The key to success is handling failure. If you risk failure, sometimes you will fail. But every time you fail, you’re that much closer to success. Success demands its percentage of failure.
Be aware that whenever you are doing something new, learning something new, taking risks or stepping outside your comfort zone, you are risking failure. All is not lost when you fail.
34456 comments
-
Comment Link
Wednesday, 11 May 2022 19:04
posted by JolwUtereemib
order viagra in the us sildenafil tablet 200mg https://aviagrasbt.com/
-
Comment Link
Wednesday, 11 May 2022 18:26
posted by off white hoodie
I'm writing to make you know what a perfect experience my wife's child enjoyed checking the blog. She discovered some pieces, most notably what it is like to possess a great giving nature to make certain people just learn about various grueling things. You truly exceeded her expectations. Many thanks for displaying such informative, trustworthy, edifying and even cool guidance on that topic to Jane.
-
Comment Link
Wednesday, 11 May 2022 11:02
posted by yeezy
My wife and i have been so cheerful when Peter managed to do his inquiry out of the ideas he came across out of the weblog. It's not at all simplistic just to happen to be giving freely thoughts which often most people may have been selling. We really grasp we've got the blog owner to appreciate for that. These explanations you made, the simple website menu, the friendships you help to instill - it is mostly fantastic, and it is leading our son and us reckon that this issue is fun, which is certainly extraordinarily serious. Thanks for all!
-
Comment Link
Wednesday, 11 May 2022 10:31
posted by supreme clothing
My wife and i were so thrilled that Edward could carry out his reports while using the precious recommendations he gained from your own web pages. It is now and again perplexing to just happen to be giving out steps which usually people have been making money from. And now we consider we now have the blog owner to thank for this. The entire illustrations you have made, the straightforward site menu, the relationships you make it easier to instill - it is all spectacular, and it's really helping our son in addition to our family reckon that the matter is excellent, which is particularly pressing. Many thanks for everything!
-
Comment Link
Wednesday, 11 May 2022 09:21
posted by kawhi leonard shoes
I must show some thanks to the writer just for bailing me out of this particular setting. Just after searching throughout the the web and coming across ideas which are not helpful, I was thinking my life was gone. Existing without the presence of solutions to the issues you've fixed by way of this review is a serious case, and the kind which might have in a negative way damaged my career if I hadn't come across your web site. That ability and kindness in taking care of every aspect was very helpful. I don't know what I would've done if I had not discovered such a stuff like this. I can also at this time look ahead to my future. Thanks so much for this reliable and result oriented help. I won't hesitate to refer your site to anyone who would like care on this problem.
-
Comment Link
Wednesday, 11 May 2022 08:44
posted by yeezy 500
I definitely wanted to make a brief comment so as to express gratitude to you for these lovely tips and hints you are writing here. My extended internet look up has at the end been recognized with beneficial facts to go over with my pals. I 'd state that that we site visitors are very much endowed to be in a notable website with many awesome individuals with valuable secrets. I feel really blessed to have come across your website and look forward to many more thrilling times reading here. Thanks a lot again for everything.
-
Comment Link
Wednesday, 11 May 2022 08:03
posted by hermes
I'm commenting to let you know of the useful encounter my friend's child developed checking yuor web blog. She discovered too many issues, not to mention how it is like to possess a marvelous teaching mindset to get a number of people without difficulty completely grasp several tricky subject matter. You truly exceeded her expectations. I appreciate you for churning out such warm and friendly, safe, edifying and even fun thoughts on your topic to Mary.
-
Comment Link
Wednesday, 11 May 2022 07:27
posted by otppgpsx
modafinil online buy provigil 200mg without prescription
-
Comment Link
Wednesday, 11 May 2022 03:39
posted by Anbnstept
hims promo code sildenafil cost sildenafil https://sildenafilkiol.com/
-
Comment Link
Wednesday, 11 May 2022 01:30
posted by supreme clothing
I am just writing to let you be aware of of the wonderful encounter my wife's daughter experienced viewing your blog. She came to understand several issues, which include how it is like to have an excellent giving heart to let men and women clearly gain knowledge of several complex things. You really did more than our own expected results. Thank you for delivering these valuable, trusted, informative and even unique thoughts on that topic to Ethel.