Print this page
Sunday, 01 April 2018 08:31

Stop People-Pleasing. Featured

Written by
Rate this item
(1 Vote)

The art of pleasing is the art of deceiving. If you are a people pleaser you are not real to yourself. A people pleaser is so nice and most helpful to people. They never say “no.”  You can always count on them for a favour.  They spend a great deal of time doing things for other people. They get their work done, help others with their work, make all the plans, and are always there for family members and friends.  This can be an extremely unhealthy pattern of behaviour.

Do you allow other people to influence the quality of your life? Are you concerned about what other people think of you? Do you often make decisions based on what you think will please others? Does your sense of self-worth come from the approval of others? Do you often withhold from sharing what you truly want, think, or feel because of fear it may upset someone? Are you often last on your list of priorities? Our egos love to be liked, approved and confirmed.  It is natural to want to fit in and not “upset others” because it feels safer. We like to play safe and in playing safe, we end up in situations we are not comfortable, but we accept these harsh conditions because we want to feel accepted.

People pleasing needs too much negative energy and this energy will deplete your most valuable resources, your time and positive energy. Being a people pleaser does not make you a good person. It makes you weak and selfish. You want their approval that you are good, but this is not the case. You are weak and selfish. You are selfish because pleasing people is all about your wants. You want to be liked by the people you please, therefore, you please them. You do not want to upset them. You want to look good for them. You are OK if they treat you with disrespect because you seek their approval. You are protecting yourself from confrontation. You are refusing to express the real you. Obsessing about how to please others or be liked is a misuse of your energy.

You are very important. Your views and opinion matters. Stop distorting yourself to be what you think others want or expect. See yourself now reclaiming all that time and energy you disburse on being over-responsible for others or working to impress others and refocus it on being of service without attachment, sharing your gifts, taking care of you, and expressing your true Self.  When doing that you will have an overflow from which to give from and you will be able to give without attachment or expectation.

Remember this, no one has the mandate to decide your worth. No one can dictate what you deserve. Other people’s reactions, responses and feelings are not your responsibility. Someone else’s opinion of you is not the truth. Your value does not come from how others perceive you. What other people think of you is none of your business. You are not created to please others. You must learn to live life to the fullest and fulfil your purpose. It takes courage to stop being afraid of what other people think about you, about your choices. It takes courage not to allow how they react towards your decisions and opinions manipulate you into doing what they want. The more you please yourself, the more pleasing you will be to other people.

The fear of rejection and failure is a basic root cause of people pleasing. Fear of Rejection can come from early relationships in which love was conditional or in which the people pleaser was rejected or abandoned by an important person in their life. Fear of failure can arise from early experiences with severe punishment for even small mistakes.  People who had highly critical parents may develop a people-pleasing pattern.  Early experiences with harsh criticism or punishment can lead to significant anxiety upon trying a task.  You do not have to be a victim forever. You are not a doormat or a punching bag for others. If you cannot let go of your victimisation, you will not be able to understand this concept that pleasing people make you selfish. You must do the inner work to honour yourself despite all you have been through.

People that are nice are people pleasing. Kindness in words creates confidence. Kindness in thinking creates profoundness. Kindness in giving creates love. It is more profitable to be kind than to be nice. Nice may look appealing, but it is nasty. Nice is not kind. Nice is pleasing and agreeable in nature; showing courtesy and politeness; of good character and reputation; respectable; socially or conventionally correct; refined or virtuous. Kind is having or showing a tender, considerate, and helping nature. Friendly, generous, sympathetic, and warm-hearted in nature. Characterised by mercy and compassion.

Kindness is rooted in the abundance of love. It comes from the compassionate essence of who we are. Niceness is rooted in lack and fear. It projects itself through the lingering pain of our unhealed wounds and going with a low sense of self-worth. In being nice you conform to perceived societal expectations not to stir up trouble. A nice person lacks self-worth and therefore does not express authenticity. The people pleasing tendencies of “nice” are rooted in selfishness—acting inauthentically for personal gain through approval and recognition. Kindness does not care what society thinks. A kind person believes in their soul and expresses authenticity. The honest, loving nature of kindness is rooted in selflessness—no approval or recognition needed. Kindness expands consciousness. When we are kind, we feel safe within ourselves.

Nice is externally motivated (fear of judgment). Kind is internally motivated (love for others). Nice tells you what it thinks you want to hear. Kind tells you what you need to hear. Nice is tense. Kind is relaxed. Nice is self-conscious. Kind is other-conscious. Nice talks. Kind acts. Nice is faux. Kind is real. Nice pacifies. Kind is present. Nice is shallow. Kind is deep. Nice is awkward. Kind is graceful. Nice lacks boundaries; it fears the word, “no.” Kind has solid boundaries; there is no fear of “no.”

Nice is weak. Kind is strong. Nice takes. Kind gives. Nice is needy. Kind is self-reliant. Nice is empty. Kind is full. Nice constricts. Kind expands. Nice is submissive. Kind is assertive. Nice is narcissistic. Kind is empathic. Nice suppresses feelings. Kind feels it all. Nice is uncertain. Kind is certain. Nice judges. Kind accepts. Nice rejects self-care. Kind embraces self-care. Nice avoids confrontation and retreats into silence. Kind confronts and protects the innocent. Nice expect recognition or reward. Kind expects nothing.

Kindness is rooted in compassion. Stop pleasing people and be authentic to yourself. Authenticity is the key to becoming your best self. People pleasing can become a habit that causes you to lose sight of your values. Learning to tolerate people being upset with you can be hard, but it is essential to reaching your goals. Your words and your behaviour must be in line with your beliefs before you can be truly authentic. Stop wasting your life pleasing others.

76285 comments

  • Comment Link sosnitikh Friday, 02 December 2022 03:08 posted by sosnitikh

    sosnitikh

    ваша милость вырвете доклад числом разборкам каров на Столице (а) также Столичной области. КАПЛЯ нами легко осуществить автоматизированный эхопоиск б/у запчастей ...
    sosnitikh

  • Comment Link sosnitikh Friday, 02 December 2022 03:08 posted by sosnitikh

    sosnitikh

    ваша милость вырвете извещение по разборкам каров в Москве (а) также Столичной области. КАПЛЯ нами легко осуществить автоматизационный поиск б/у запасных частей ...
    sosnitikh

  • Comment Link sosnitikh Friday, 02 December 2022 03:08 posted by sosnitikh

    sosnitikh

    ваша милость найдете оповещение числом разборкам автомобилей в течение Москве да Столичной области. ВСЕГО нами легко реализовать автоматизированный поиск б/у запчастей ...
    sosnitikh

  • Comment Link Elwoodduh Friday, 02 December 2022 02:44 posted by Elwoodduh

    clonidine otc

  • Comment Link currency trading market Friday, 02 December 2022 01:24 posted by currency trading market

    Hi there, just became alert to your blog through Google, and found that it is trulyinformative. I'm going to watch out for brussels. I'll be grateful if you continuethis in future. Lots of people will be benefited from your writing.Cheers!

  • Comment Link Samslems Friday, 02 December 2022 00:57 posted by Samslems

    buy lyrica from canada atarax 25 mg price in india voltaren gel canada pharmacy order suhagra 100

  • Comment Link prilosec 20 mg generic Friday, 02 December 2022 00:48 posted by prilosec 20 mg generic

    dutasteride canada dutasteride tablets dutasteride medication

  • Comment Link EdwinViachen Thursday, 01 December 2022 22:01 posted by EdwinViachen

    http://hnoarzt.com.de/gaggenau

  • Comment Link erfahrung mit bitcoin Thursday, 01 December 2022 21:43 posted by erfahrung mit bitcoin

    Was ist Bitcoin?
    Bitcoin bitcoin up ist eine dezentrale digitale Wahrung minus Zentralbank oder einzelnen Administrator, die bar Zwischenhandler von Benutzer zu Benutzer vom Peer-to-Peer-Bitcoin-Netzwerk gesendet sein kann. Transaktionen werden von Netzwerkknoten anhand Kryptografie verifiziert ferner in einem offentlich verteilten Hauptbuch namens Blockchain aufgezeichnet. Bitcoin wurde von von unbekannten Person oder aber Personengruppe unter seinem Namen Satoshi Nakamoto erfunden und 2009 als Open-Source-Software veroffentlicht.
    Bitcoins werden denn Belohnung fur 1 Prozess geschaffen, dieser als Mining bekannt ist . Selbige konnen gegen weitere Wahrungen, Produkte ferner Dienstleistungen eingetauscht werden. Seit Februar 2015 akzeptierten uber 100. 000 Handler und Anbieter Bitcoin als Zahlungsmittel.
    Was hat den jungsten Ausbau des Bitcoin-Preises verursacht?
    Der jungste Bitcoin-Preisanstieg wurde durch die Kombination von Kriterien verursacht. Erstens gesammelt die COVID-19-Pandemie uber einer erhohten wirtschaftlichen Unsicherheit gefuhrt, was das Interesse jener Anleger an Bitcoin als potenziellem sicheren Hafen geweckt hat. Zweitens investieren gro? e institutionelle Investoren zunehmend in Bitcoin, was dazu beigetragen hat, die Preise in die Sehr hohe zu treiben. Schlie? lich wird auch angenommen, dass dasjenige bevorstehende Halving-Ereignis zum Preisanstieg beitragt, da die Anleger davon ausgehen, dass das geringere Angebot an neuen Bitcoins zu hoheren Preisen fuhren wird.
    Wie funktioniert Bitcoin?
    Sofern es um Bitcoin geht, befinden sich etliche Dinge, die in die Funktionsweise einflie? en. Zunachst einmal ist Bitcoin diese eine, dezentrale Wahrung, welches bedeutet, dass jene nicht von einer Zentralbank oder Herrschaft reguliert wird. Das bedeutet auch, falls es keine einzelne Einheit gibt, alle die Lieferung vonseiten Bitcoin kontrollieren moglicherweise. Stattdessen wird dasjenige Angebot an Bitcoin vom Netzwerk im ubrigen bestimmt. Wir kennen die begrenzte Anzahl vonseiten Bitcoins, die jemals geschurft werden konnen, und das Schurfen neuer Bitcoins erfordert mit der Arbeitszeit immer mehr Rechenleistung.
    Also, wie schurft man Bitcoins? Hier, jedes Mal, wenn der Blockchain (die das offentliche Hauptbuch aller Bitcoin-Transaktionen ist) ein neuer Block hinzugefugt wird, werden Miner mit einer bestimmten Anzahl von Bitcoins belohnt. Mit der absicht der Blockchain 1 neuen Block hinzuzufugen, mussen Miner das komplexes mathematisches Aufgabe losen.

    Was sind die Vorteile von Bitcoin?
    Bitcoin zusammen sich in welchen letzten Jahren uber einer beliebten Wahrung entwickelt. Hier sind immer wieder einige Vorteile jener Verwendung von Bitcoin:

    1. Bitcoin ist echt dezentralisiert, was bedeutet, dass es von keiner Regierung oder aber Finanzinstitution kontrolliert wird. Dies kann wie Vorteil angesehen werden, da es welchen Benutzern mehr Kontrolle uber ihr Bargeld gibt.
    2. Transaktionen mit Bitcoin bitcoin up befinden sich schnell und gunstig. Dies liegt daran, dass keine Legat (wie Banken) an der Abwicklung jener Zahlungen beteiligt sind immer wieder.
    3. Bitcoin ist pseudonym, was bedeutet, dass Benutzer bei der Verwendung dieser Wahrung relativ anonym bleiben konnen. Das kann fur Nutzer attraktiv sein, die Wert auf Privatsphare legen.


    Welche Risiken einer Investment in Bitcoin
    Bitcoin ist ein digitaler Vermogenswert und ein von Satoshi Nakamoto erfundenes Zahlungssystem. Transaktionen werden von Netzwerkknoten durch Kryptografie verifiziert und in dem offentlichen verteilten Hauptbuch namens Blockchain aufgezeichnet. Bitcoin ist insofern einzigartig, als es eine endliche Zahl von ihnen vorhanden ist: 21 Millionen.
    Bitcoins werden als Belohnung fur einen Prozess geschaffen, der wie Mining bekannt ist naturlich. Sie https://sites.google.com/view/bitcoin-up-app/ konnen gegen andere Wahrungen, Produkte und Dienstleistungen eingetauscht werden. Seit Februar 2015 akzeptierten uber 100. 000 Handler und Anbieter Bitcoin als Zahlungsmittel.
    Die Investition daruber hinaus Bitcoin ist verfahrensweise, da es einander um eine neuzeitliche Technologie handelt, alle von keiner Konzern oder Finanzinstitution unterstutzt wird. Der Wert von Bitcoin moglicherweise stark schwanken, ferner Anleger konnten ihr ganzes Geld abkacken, wenn der Preis absturzt. Es besteht ebenso das Risiko, dass Hacker Bitcoins unfein Online-Geldborsen oder -Borsen stehlen konnten.

  • Comment Link sosnitikk Thursday, 01 December 2022 19:37 posted by sosnitikk

    sosnitikk

    Авторазборка мицубиси Мицубиси делика д 2 2012 разборка экстрим-спорт Заводиться Разъезжать на шевелись является возможет все проверить двс электромотор электромотор K12B-1577905 ящик ...
    sosnitikk