Abraham: Faith That Obeys
Category: Character Studies
Lesson 3: Choosing Peace Over Possession
Primary Passage: Genesis 13:1–18
Study Level: Foundation
Estimated Study Time: 20–30 minutes
Central Truth
Faith does not need to fight for what God has promised.
Learning Objective
By the end of this lesson, you should be able to explain how confidence in God’s promise enables a believer to pursue peace, act generously and make decisions without fear, rivalry or selfish ambition.
Key Bible Verse
“Let there be no strife, I pray thee, between me and thee... for we be brethren.”
Genesis 13:8, KJV
Sound Biblical Teaching
After leaving Egypt, Abram returned to the land God had called him to enter. He travelled through the south and returned to the area between Bethel and Hai, where he had previously built an altar.
“And there Abram called on the name of the LORD.”
Genesis 13:4, KJV
Abram’s return to the altar was significant. His experience in Egypt had exposed fear and poor judgement, but he did not remain defined by his mistake. He returned to worship and resumed his journey with God.
Abram and Lot had both become wealthy. They possessed livestock, tents and many servants. Their increase created a practical problem:
“And the land was not able to bear them, that they might dwell together.”
Genesis 13:6, KJV
The issue was not necessarily a lack of blessing. It was the pressure created by growth. Their possessions had increased beyond what the available land and water could support while they remained together.
Conflict then developed between Abram’s herdsmen and Lot’s herdsmen. The dispute concerned grazing land, water and the management of their livestock.
Scripture also notes:
“And the Canaanite and the Perizzite dwelled then in the land.”
Genesis 13:7, KJV
This detail shows that their disagreement was taking place in public view. The surrounding people could observe how Abram’s household handled internal conflict.
Abram took the initiative. He said to Lot:
“Let there be no strife, I pray thee, between me and thee... for we be brethren.”
Genesis 13:8, KJV
Abram valued their relationship more than the opportunity to secure the best land for himself. Although he was older, the recognised leader and the person to whom God had given the promise, he allowed Lot to choose first.
“Is not the whole land before thee? separate thyself, I pray thee, from me.”
Genesis 13:9, KJV
Lot looked towards the plain of Jordan and saw that it was well watered. From a natural perspective, it appeared to be the superior choice. Lot selected the land that looked most productive and moved east.
Abram remained in Canaan.
Lot’s decision was based mainly on what he could see. However, the passage immediately warns that he pitched his tent towards Sodom, whose people were described as exceedingly wicked.
After Lot separated from Abram, God spoke again:
“Lift up now thine eyes, and look from the place where thou art.”
Genesis 13:14, KJV
God reaffirmed that the land Abram could see would be given to him and his descendants. Abram did not lose his promise because he allowed Lot to choose first.
God’s promise was not dependent on Abram winning a competition. It was secured by God’s faithfulness.
Abram later moved to the plain of Mamre in Hebron and built another altar unto the Lord.
The chapter begins and ends with Abram at an altar. Worship framed his decisions, restored his focus and reminded him that God was the true source of his future.
Clear Explanation
Growth can create pressure
Abram and Lot experienced conflict partly because both had prospered.
We often assume that problems arise only from lack, failure or hardship. However, increase can also create tension.
Growth may bring:
- Greater responsibility
- Limited space
- Competing priorities
- More people to manage
- Disagreement over resources
- Questions about authority
- Pressure to restructure relationships
The presence of conflict does not always mean that growth was wrong. It may mean that the current arrangement can no longer support what has developed.
Maturity recognises when change is needed and handles that change without hostility.
Abram addressed the conflict early
Abram did not ignore the disagreement between the herdsmen. He intervened before the conflict grew into a serious division.
Unresolved tension rarely disappears by itself. It often becomes stronger through silence, assumptions and repeated offences.
Peace requires initiative.
Do not wait for a disagreement to become destructive before addressing it. Speak respectfully, listen carefully and seek a practical solution while the situation can still be managed.
Abram prioritised relationship over possession
Abram said, “for we be brethren.”
He reminded Lot that their relationship was more important than the disputed land. He refused to allow livestock, grazing rights or material advantage to destroy family unity.
This does not mean that possessions and boundaries have no value. It means that they should not become more valuable than people, integrity and peace.
Ask yourself:
- Am I protecting a possession while damaging a relationship?
- Am I trying to win rather than resolve the problem?
- Has pride made compromise feel like defeat?
- Am I valuing the issue more than the person?
Not every relationship can remain unchanged. Sometimes separation becomes necessary. However, separation can be handled respectfully without hatred, humiliation or revenge.
Abram gave Lot the first choice
Abram had stronger standing, but he did not insist on using his position to secure the best visible option.
He trusted God enough to be generous.
Generosity becomes difficult when people believe there is not enough for everyone. Fear says:
- Secure your advantage first.
- Take the best before someone else does.
- Do not give another person an opportunity.
- You may never recover what you release.
Faith says that God is not limited by another person’s choice.
Abram understood that Lot could choose land, but Lot could not take God’s covenant from him.
Lot judged mainly by appearance
Lot saw a well-watered plain. The land looked productive, attractive and secure.
However, what appeared beneficial also brought him closer to Sodom.
A decision can look excellent financially while creating spiritual, moral or relational danger.
Visible advantage should never be the only basis for a decision.
Before choosing, consider:
- The spiritual environment
- The long-term consequences
- The people who will influence you
- The effect on your family
- The values connected to the opportunity
- Whether the decision draws you towards or away from God
Not everything that looks prosperous is safe.
Peace does not mean weakness
Abram’s decision to avoid strife was not cowardice. It required confidence.
Insecure people often fight over every advantage because they fear losing significance, recognition or opportunity.
Abram could release the first choice because he trusted God’s promise.
Choosing peace does not mean accepting abuse, ignoring injustice or refusing to establish boundaries. It means refusing to let pride, competition and greed control your response.
Biblical peace is strong enough to seek resolution without becoming hostile.
God reaffirmed His promise after Abram released control
After Lot chose the attractive land, God told Abram to look in every direction.
Abram released the power to control the immediate outcome, but he did not lose what God had planned for him.
There are moments when releasing control creates room for greater clarity.
You may fear that being fair, generous or peaceful will leave you disadvantaged. This passage teaches that obedience does not cancel God’s provision.
People may choose before you. They may receive something that looks better. They may appear to advance faster. None of this gives them authority to cancel what God has appointed for your life.
Abram continued to worship
Abram built an altar in Hebron.
He did not build a monument to his generosity. He worshipped God.
Faithful decisions should lead to gratitude, not self-praise. When God gives peace, direction or provision, return the honour to Him.
Practical Application
1. Identify the real source of the conflict
The visible disagreement may not be the deepest issue.
A dispute about money may actually involve mistrust. A disagreement about responsibilities may involve poor communication. Competition may reflect insecurity.
Ask:
- What are we arguing about?
- What is the deeper concern?
- Is the problem lack of resources, unclear roles or wounded pride?
- What would a fair resolution require?
Address the real issue, not only the latest incident.
2. Take responsibility for starting the conversation
Abram approached Lot.
Do not wait indefinitely for the other person to act. Prepare yourself, pray and begin the conversation respectfully.
You can say:
“This disagreement is affecting our relationship. Let us find a fair and peaceful way forward.”
Speak about the issue without attacking the person.
3. Decide what matters most
Not every dispute deserves the same energy.
Determine whether you are defending:
- A biblical principle
- A necessary boundary
- Another person’s safety
- Personal pride
- Status
- Convenience
- Material advantage
Stand firmly where truth and safety require it. Release what is driven only by ego or competition.
4. Look for a peaceful structure
Abram and Lot could no longer remain together under the same arrangement. Separation became the practical solution.
Sometimes peace requires restructuring:
- Clarifying responsibilities
- Dividing resources fairly
- Creating boundaries
- Changing working arrangements
- Allowing different leadership roles
- Ending an unhealthy partnership respectfully
- Agreeing on separate paths
Peace is not always the continuation of the same arrangement. Sometimes peace is a well-managed change.
5. Refuse scarcity thinking
Lot’s choice did not leave Abram without a future.
Do not assume that another person’s success reduces what is available to you. God can provide through places and methods you have not considered.
Act fairly. Avoid manipulation. Trust that integrity will not destroy your future.
6. Examine the full environment before choosing
Do not select an opportunity only because it offers more money, influence or visibility.
Investigate:
- The values of the organisation
- The people involved
- The demands on your family
- The effect on your spiritual life
- The likely long-term consequences
- The cost of maintaining the opportunity
A well-watered plain may still lead towards Sodom.
7. Build an altar after the decision
After resolving a difficult matter, take time to pray.
Thank God for wisdom. Ask Him to heal any remaining hurt. Commit the outcome to Him. Refuse to replay the dispute repeatedly in your mind.
Peace must be protected after it is established.
Reflection
Answer these questions honestly.
- Why were Abram and Lot no longer able to remain together under the same arrangement?
- How did Abram respond to the conflict between their herdsmen?
- Why was Abram willing to let Lot choose first?
- What did Lot consider when choosing the plain of Jordan?
- What danger was connected to Lot’s decision?
- Is there a current disagreement that you have allowed to continue for too long?
- Are you more concerned with winning or restoring peace?
- What possession, position or advantage are you afraid to release?
- Is scarcity thinking influencing your behaviour?
- What practical arrangement could reduce conflict?
- Have you considered the spiritual and long-term consequences of your present choices?
- How can you pursue peace without abandoning necessary boundaries?
Prayer
Heavenly Father, thank You for being the source of my provision and future. Deliver me from fear, greed, pride and unhealthy competition. Give me wisdom to address conflict early and courage to pursue peace. Help me to value people above possessions and integrity above visible advantage. Teach me to be generous without becoming careless and peaceful without abandoning truth. Guide my decisions so that I do not choose only by outward appearance. Strengthen my confidence in Your promises and help me trust You with every outcome. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
Action
Identify one unresolved conflict involving a relationship, responsibility, possession or opportunity.
Complete the following:
The disagreement is about:
The deeper issue may be:
What I am afraid of losing is:
What matters most in this situation is:
The peaceful and responsible step I can take is:
The person I need to speak with is:
I will begin this conversation by:
Take one practical step within the next twenty-four hours. Speak truthfully, listen carefully and seek a solution that protects peace, fairness and integrity.
Faith does not fight for every visible advantage. It trusts God, chooses peace and allows integrity to guide the decision.