Print this page
Sunday, 06 September 2020 05:41

Silent Abuse — Part 2 Featured

Written by
Rate this item
(0 votes)

It is child abuse when a child witnessed domestic abuse. Children who are exposed to violence in the home are victims of physical abuse. The fighting parent does not understand the impact it has on their children.  Children need an environment that is safe and secure, a home free of violence.

Children need parents that love and protect them. They need to have a sense of routine and stability so that when things go wrong in the outside world, home is a place of comfort, help and support.

Home is far from a haven for too many children. Every year, hundreds of millions of children are exposed to domestic violence at home, and this has a powerful and profound impact on their lives and hopes for the future. These children not only watch one parent violently assaulting another, they often hear the distressing sounds of violence or are aware of it from many tell-tale signs.

Key findings reveal that there is an increased risk of children becoming victims of abuse themselves. Among victims of child abuse, 40 per cent report domestic violence in the home. There is a significant risk of ever-increasing harm to the child’s physical, emotional, and social development. Children who are exposed to violence in the home experience so much added emotional stress that it can harm the development of their brains and impair cognitive and sensory growth. As they grow, children who are exposed to violence could continue to show signs of problems. Primary-school-age children could have more trouble with schoolwork and show poor concentration and focus. They tend not to do as well in school. In one study, forty per cent had lower reading abilities than children from non-violent homes.

The single best predictor of children becoming either perpetrators or victims of domestic violence later in life is whether they grow up in a home where there is domestic violence. Studies from various countries support the findings that rates of abuse are higher among women whose husbands were abused as children or who saw their mothers being abused. Children who grow up with violence in the home learn early and powerful lessons about the use of violence in interpersonal relationships to dominate others and might even be encouraged in doing so.

Not all children fall into the trap of becoming victims or abusers. Many adults who grew up with violence in the home are actively opposed to violence of all kinds. There is reason to believe that children know that domestic violence is wrong and actively want it to stop. Many children who are present during acts of domestic violence try to help. One study showed that in 15 per cent of the cases when children were present, they tried to prevent the violence, and 6 per cent tried to get outside help. Another 10 per cent actively tried to protect the victim or make the violence stop.

Extract from “Stop Violence in the Home” UNICEF.

Most people in an abusive relationship make excuses for their abusers. They will tell you their abusers does not mean to abuse them. They seldom quote that it was a mistake their abuser does not mean to hurt them. But it is a never-ending cycle in their life. Sometimes they are being manipulated by their abusers who gives them the same lame excuse they broadcast. Saying hurtful, negative things and apologising later can become a cycle of emotional abuse if there is no genuine effort to make a change. The worst excuse I have heard is the one that talks about love. They claim the abuser loves them. Are you kidding me? Do you know the meaning of love? Love does not abuse. Your abuser does not love you that is why they are abusing you.

People who abuse others are skilled manipulators. Family, friends, police officers, judges and service providers get taken in and miss what is truly going on. Their partners are often looking for something – anything – that will help make sense of abusive behaviour. We do not distinguish very well between domestic abuse and responsive or situational violence. We mistake correlation (two things frequently happening together) for causation (one thing causing the other).

For instance, because domestic abuse and substance use often occur together, many people mistakenly assume that substance use causes domestic abuse – and that attending to substance use will stop domestic abuse. We look only at physical violence and ignore the silent abuse where there are internal injuries, one that might never heal because they are not seen to be treated.

Talking about the nice girl syndrome, some behaviours as a little girl earned you praise, but these behaviours will not get you far in life, it will hinder you and be a stumbling block. There is nothing wrong for being nice. As plenty of psychologists and authors have pointed out over the years, the qualities we value and praise in little girls--being kind to everyone, agreeable, quiet, and contented at school, etc.--Rarely translate well when those girls grow up and go looking for professional success.

Women who excelled in education find themselves too eager to please, too afraid of ruffling feathers, and too unaccustomed to failure and struggle to initially handle the rough and tumble business world. These women tend to also please their abusive husband in the name of being submissive. One statement that has been gravely abused is” wife be submissive to your husband.” What does that mean if the husband does not love the wife? It is the love of the husband for the wife that breeds her submission. Submission is not something you can force without the sacrifice of love.

The life of the Nice Girl revolves around "the idea that you have to be nice to everyone to be loved and accepted. Which is basically 'mission impossible. The nice girl struggles to say no because she does not want to offend others. She is terrified of upsetting others. Your self-image as a Nice Girl is constructed around the idea that you must be nice to everyone to be loved and accepted.

The most difficult part of a violent or abusive relationship is breaking the cycle of abuse. The longer you stay in this dangerous, abusive relationship, the more violent your abuser will become and the tougher it will be for you end things. Avoid rationalising or dismissing abuse. Be aware of the honeymoon phase of abuse. In some cases, abuse is followed by a "honeymoon phase," a period in which the abuser treats their victim nicely. Avoid falling for niceness after abuse. One common reason individual stay in abusive relationships is because they have hope that their abuser will change.

Find your power. There could be many reasons individual stay in abusive relationships, and one of which could be because they feel powerless and unable to act. This feeling may be compounded by circumstances, such as poverty or fear of being alone. Get yourself help. Start by searching for local resources that are designed to help victims of abuse. You could receive job training, legal counselling, financial services, and services for your children. Do not be ashamed to ask for help.


  • Comment Link yeezy 350 Friday, 13 August 2021 10:05 posted by yeezy 350

    I have to express my appreciation for your kind-heartedness giving support to men who need help with this particular subject matter. Your real commitment to passing the solution across ended up being pretty useful and has truly permitted ladies just like me to get to their targets. The insightful guideline indicates a whole lot to me and still more to my office workers. Thanks a lot; from everyone of us.

  • Comment Link jordan 1 off white Friday, 13 August 2021 04:32 posted by jordan 1 off white

    I'm commenting to make you know what a brilliant encounter my wife's daughter developed using yuor web blog. She mastered so many issues, which include what it's like to possess a great teaching character to let other individuals really easily grasp various specialized issues. You actually surpassed visitors' desires. Thank you for giving such insightful, safe, informative and unique thoughts on your topic to Mary.

  • Comment Link odgwormald Thursday, 12 August 2021 22:14 posted by odgwormald

    satin dress ruched side nike kyrie irving 4 white blue uk nike air foamposite pro fighter jet double blazer dress adidas yeezy boost 350 v2 beluga 2.0 2.0 nike hyperdunk 2015 flyknit low black brown

  • Comment Link michael jordan shoes Thursday, 12 August 2021 18:32 posted by michael jordan shoes

    I want to show my gratitude for your kindness for those individuals that have the need for guidance on this one issue. Your special dedication to getting the message all-around ended up being definitely practical and have constantly allowed girls just like me to attain their goals. Your informative advice implies so much a person like me and still more to my office colleagues. Regards; from all of us.

  • Comment Link Kevinwep Thursday, 12 August 2021 10:12 posted by Kevinwep

    gay black dating sites
    gay dating hastings
    popular gay dating site

  • Comment Link chrome hearts store Wednesday, 11 August 2021 23:32 posted by chrome hearts store

    Thank you so much for giving everyone an extraordinarily nice chance to read critical reviews from this website. It can be so great and also full of a great time for me personally and my office acquaintances to search the blog at a minimum thrice every week to find out the new issues you have got. And lastly, we're actually satisfied with your good information served by you. Certain 4 ideas in this post are indeed the most efficient I have had.

  • Comment Link moncler Wednesday, 11 August 2021 21:36 posted by moncler

    I wish to express my appreciation to this writer just for rescuing me from this particular incident. Because of exploring throughout the world-wide-web and coming across concepts which are not helpful, I assumed my life was done. Living devoid of the approaches to the difficulties you have solved through your main guide is a crucial case, as well as ones which could have badly damaged my entire career if I had not encountered your website. The capability and kindness in controlling the whole thing was important. I'm not sure what I would've done if I hadn't encountered such a thing like this. It's possible to at this point relish my future. Thanks for your time very much for the skilled and sensible help. I won't be reluctant to endorse your web site to any individual who would like recommendations about this area.

  • Comment Link golden goose sneakers Wednesday, 11 August 2021 16:29 posted by golden goose sneakers

    I precisely wished to appreciate you once more. I'm not certain the things that I could possibly have handled in the absence of these hints shown by you concerning that theme. It has been an absolute horrifying matter for me personally, nevertheless witnessing a well-written tactic you dealt with that forced me to jump for happiness. I will be thankful for the service and even have high hopes you comprehend what an amazing job you were putting in instructing people today thru your blog. I am sure you have never got to know all of us.

  • Comment Link golden goose shoes Wednesday, 11 August 2021 05:23 posted by golden goose shoes

    I have to voice my respect for your generosity supporting those people that really need guidance on this idea. Your very own dedication to passing the solution all through ended up being definitely beneficial and have specifically allowed associates just like me to arrive at their pursuits. Your personal important tutorial entails this much to me and somewhat more to my colleagues. Thanks a lot; from each one of us.

  • Comment Link zdarusa Wednesday, 11 August 2021 03:47 posted by zdarusa

    nike free tr fit 3 print black billig best jerseys in nhl history nike air max 90 all white shoes on sale billig grey retro 13s billig cheap new era hats china free shipping jordan 6 black yellow billig